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j ai recupere un bouquin de blagues australienne principalement des "one liners" je vous livre certaines des plus marrantes
he s a master of the english language: he is the only bloke i know who can describe pamela anderson and dolly parton without using his hands !
he s such a bad driver: i had never seen a st christopher medal sweating before
definition of stupid: his driveway doesn t quite reach the garage
definition of stupid: his stait doesn t quite reach the top floor
the dentist had a look at his teeth and told him it would be cheaper to buy a dog to chew his food dor him
the neutron bomb kills the people but leaves the buildings standing, a bit like your average home loan
i get four weeks off each year: two weeks when i go away, and two weeks when my boss is away
we use vaseline as a sex aid: put it on the door knob to stop the kids getting in
i have to hand it to my wife: when she s right, she s the first to admit it
censorship rating: G nobody gets the girl PG the good guy gets the girl R bad guy gets the girl X evereyone get the girl
he has such a boring existence: each morning he goes trough the death notice and cross their name out of the phone book
the CSIRO tested my wife s cooking, the result : ninety eight percent of their laboraory rats have started bringing their own lunch
isn t it interesting that once you passed your driver license s test, you never drive like that again for the rest of your life?
a gift for people with plenty of spare time: a dictionnary that s not in alphabetical order
i have 3 children, two are alive and one is in the public service
life is a bitch: i just god rid of my acne and now i m going bald
i m not an only child, mut my mum told me if i had been born first i WOULD have been
when i took her out to dinner, she ordered the most expensive thing on the menu: a big mac AND the large french fries
he wanted to give his body to the science, but his biology teacher said she had other plans for the week end
what do you call a dog with no legs? nothing, he s not going to be able to come anyway
talk about bad childhood: my dad used to take me on hunting trips with him- always gave me a three minute start though
how many vietnam vets does it take to change a lightbulb ? you wouldn t bloody know mate, 'cause you weren t there OK ?
I'm all for statues of our politician leaders: give the pigeons a chance to speak for us all
reality is a crutch for people who can t handle alcohol
doctor: well first the good news: you re going to have a fatal disease named after you
what is green, has six legs, and if it fell off a tree it would probably kill you ? a billiard table
if you want to be remembered and talked about forever, try forgetting your wife s birthday !
i rang a real estate agent in sidney from a phone box last week, i asked him what i could rent for 200 dollars a week "you re standing in it" he answered
after we got married, we went back to the drive in. guess what? they actually show movies there !!
definition of plastic surgery: putting your money where your mouth was
god is a single parent
a special day for my stupid mate: it s the anniversary of the day when he found out the the coyote NEVER catches the road runner!
the australian opera was banned from G viewing time... obviously too much sax and violins (ouch)
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